Do You Wanna Know How This Story Plays Out?
by AlessanaVargas
Summary: Series of drabbles, one shots, and tumblr prompts.
1. This Is The Only Way

**anonymous asked:**

 **For the good old days, Quinn protecting Rachel from Finn**

* * *

Quinn sighs, she watches Rachel storm off and even though she knows exactly where to find her she doesn't rush, she knows the girl needs times and, if she's honest, so does she. She walks slowly after her, she knows the way to the auditorium by heart now and she knows she will find Rachel in there; and she does find her there, sitting at the piano, her hands still on her lap. It's heart breaking.

"Rachel, I know you're mad. But I only did what I had to do."

She sees Rachel sniffing and she has to root herself in place, its done, its all done and there's no going in any other direction than forward.

"Why, Quinn? It was just a song, do you _really_ need it so badly? Are we back to _that_ point now?"

"I promised you I would protect you, do you remember that? I told you that no matter what I would do that. And I'm just trying to keep my promise."

She watches Rachel wipe the tears off of her face and she wishes she had tissues to give her, even though they would probably be rejected.

"How is _this_ protecting me? You're breaking my heart again."

Before she can answer, she has to swallow down all the emotions, Rachel's right and she has no right to make it about her own heart ache.

"I won't let Finn's mediocrity be an obstacle in you achieving your goal. I know this competition is important and I will not let anyone ruin it for you."

No answer, Rachel is silent and all Quinn can do is stand up straight and hope that will help hold her up, but then come the words that almost physically push her down to the ground.

"I miss you, Quinn. I miss us. Could we please give it another chance?"

Not once does Rachel look up to meet Quinn's eyes, and she's relieved because she knows her face would betray the words that will come out of her mouth.

"I'm sorry, Rachel. I've already proven I'm no good for you, and it's not just Finn I need to protect you from."

An almost silent sob and Quinn's heart explodes into a billion shards hurting her all over.

"Listen, Rach. It's just one more song, one more competition and you'll be okay. I promise."

She gently, with caution, places her hand on Rachel's shaking shoulders, and leaves.


	2. Break Ups and Screw Ups

**A/N: This one will have a continuation this week without delay.**

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 **anonymous** asked:

Rachel walking in on Quinn and Santana having sex

* * *

"I'm almost there Kurt, just walking up the stairs"

" _Listen, Rach… I know you're already there but, are you sure? I mean, you didn't exactly leave things on a good note last month and I don't want you to be unsure of anything. You can always turn around."_

"I'm sure, I know I made a mistake letting her walk away like that and I want to make it up."

" _Ok then, let me know alright?"_

"I promise. Actually, I'm walking in right no- What the fuck!?"

" _Rach? Everything okay?"_

"…."

"RACHEL!"

"Quinn, I've warned you about calling me that!"

"No, San!… Ra - Rachel is here."

" _Is that Santana and Quin!?"_

"I'm - I - I shouldn't have - I- I have to go."


	3. Things We Said (To Make This Over)

**A/N:** I haven't updated in ages. But I got this prompt a while ago and realized I hadn't posted it here. Let's call this a "I haven't forgotten about this site, the fanfictions or you guys" mini fic.

* * *

 _ **22\. things you said after it was over**_

* * *

"You know, Quinn. I just thought of something."

Quinn's gathering all her stuff, she has the bags ready to be filled, just clothes and personal objects she has there, books too; movies and cds she won't bother gathering, Rachel can have them.

"Quinn, I'm trying to tell you something."

Quinn continues with her things and ignores her, she thought that they were all talked out; at least that's what Rachel had said and she doesn't really have the energy to listen to her anymore.

"Fine then, ignore me, I'll talk anyway."

"What a shocker! Rachel Berry can't stand not hearing her own voice."

Quinn adds annoyed to the long list of emotions she has at the moment, but she doesn't stop her movements. If Rachel wants to talk, she can talk.

"I finally figured out why I was never enough. It's because of your nature, it's because you're a writer and you need sadness to write. You don't know how to be happy."

Quinn has to physically force herself to keep moving, she can't believe what Rachel just said. She had never though of Rachel as a daft person... until then, until that very moment. She's realizing that Rachel never really paid attenton to anything she wrote, it was always about her.

"You just can't deal with happiness, you're too erratic to handle stability and happiness; it suffocates you... _I_ suffocate you. I had never understood that until now."

She's all packed up, she's just thankful that they didn't live together, that way she doesn't have to worry about finding out a place to stay, she only has to focus on getting out of there.

"It's okay though, I just hope that one day you'll let yourself be happy."

Quinn's blood is boiling, Rachel's tone is so condescending that it pissed her off , her hand is shaking as she holds the door knob but she focuses on the movement of turning it and opening the door; she puts all of her things in the hallway and steps outside.

"You know what, Rachel?"

She turns around slowly, with a motive.

" _I'm_ sorry. I'm sorry you never actually got over yourself enough to be able to see everyone else in the world and not just you, I hope you learn how to do that some day. I'm sorry you're so selfish, I'm sorry you still have not learned that other people's feelings are important too, I'm sorry you love hearing yourself talk so much. I'm sorry you need people so badly but you are never able to keep them from leaving. I really do hope you learn how to be happy with yourself. I _was_ happy with you, but I guess you will always need drama more than you need me."

Quinn turns around and closes the door behind her. She knows now there's no turning back.


	4. What Is This Inside of Me?

**A/N: Ok so this now has a title and probably a follow up!**

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It's 5 in the morning when she wakes up the first time, it is not because of a nightmare or a mistimed alarm on her phone either, she just wakes up. She opens her eyes and is confused for a moment while her brain catches up and her eyes adjust to the lack of light, she realizes she's still in her bedroom and reached to grab her phone from her nightstand to see the hour. With a swift movement of her finger, the screen lights up and a big "5:00" pops up; she doesn't have to be up for another four hours so she puts the phone down and changes her position in the bed to go back to sleep.

/ / / / /

The next time she wakes up it is 6:30 in the morning, there's a little more light coming through the windows and this time she doesn't need to get her phone to know it's not time to get up yet. She tosses her pillow aside and lies down on her stomach.

/ / / / /

The third time she wakes up it's 8:00 in the morning, she checks the time on her phone and buries her face in the pillow, there's a strange feeling on her chest and she suddenly feels like crying. She shakes her head and inhales deeply through her nose. As she exhales she realizes that she doesn't feel rested in the least bit, she might as well have not slept at all and she would be feeling exactly the same way. Even though she knows she won't be able to get any more sleep she still doesn't feel like getting out of bed, her chest feels heavy and there's a subtle tingling on her fingers (like when the weather outside is cold and you enter a hot room and you're starting to regain feeling on them), she turns on her back and just lays there staring at the ceiling. Her mind wanders along with the reflections of sunlight that reflects through the windows and to the ceiling and before she knows it her alarm goes off, she can't avoid getting up anymore, she's got a schedule and she wants to have so time left.

/ / / / /

After cleaning up, getting some breakfast and showering, she's now standing in front of her mirror, as she's done so many times before, trying to figure out what to wear. She notices the feeling in her stomach and how it invades her chest, her hands, her mind… like a sort of numbness or static and she realizes it had been a long time coming, almost overdue, she grows annoyed and just settles with a pair of jeans, white Converse shoes, a long blue sweater and a grey scarf. She can almost feel her clothes slipping from her hands as she gets dressed, as if her fingers lost all their strength.

She feels like breaking something, throwing something across the room or just punching a wall, she hates waking up like that, she hates feeling like that in general, but if she had any choice at all she prefers when it slowly creeps up on her throughout the day because that way she can at least pass it like being tired. It doesn't matter that Santana has told her time and time again that it is not her fault and that she can't have any control over it; every time she gets like that, she still thinks she should be able to have some sort of control over it, or at least some self control, it's her mind, her body, for God's sake!

With a sigh she picks up the backpack that's next to her bed and walks out of her room and into the cool corridor of the Yale building she's living in that semester. The chilled air impacts with her warm face and she tries blaming it all on the weather, but as she walks through the courtyard, which is currently covered in snow, she dismisses that idea. She's always found snow beautifully looking.

She tightens her scarf and puts her hands in the pockets of her coat because even though they're protected by a pair of dark green gloves they're still cold, and she makes way to the bust stop, it's not too far it's just outside campus, a ten minute walk at the most. She's not in a hurry either, she left a little earlier because she doesn't want to have to rush, she wants to be able to take her time and she's not sure she is able to move fast any way. She finally arrives to the bus station and checks her wristwatch just to confirm she hasn't missed her bus, she hasn't she just has to wait 10 minutes for it and it will take her to the central train station, she's got a long weekend and it is her turn to go to New York to see Rachel, commitment that she seriously considered cancelling that morning, but seeing Rachel always made things better and maybe it would help her with her current state of mind.

The ride to the train station seems shorter to her, not because the driver speeded since it is impossible due to the snow, but her mind has just been absent the entire morning and she didn't pay attention to the streets as she passed them by.

She gets off the bus and goes into the train station, she knows the path by memory and she doesn't even pay attention to anything or anyone around her, she just makes her way amongst the crowded station and goes straight to the train she's supposed to get into, she's not carrying a suitcase so she doesn't have to worry about bumping into anyone's feet, there's not really a point in carrying a suitcase, she has plenty of clothes at Rachel's, just her backpack with a couple of books and her computer, she prefers to travel light so it doesn't bother her.

As soon as she finds a seat on the train, she closes her eyes, relaxes into the comfortable couch-like seat and feels as if her whole body is sinking and turning to static. She stays like that for a couple of minutes but her heart starts speeding, she doesn't like that one bit, so she opens her eyes and changes her posture. It doesn't matter how much she tries or how many times she changes sitting positions though, the static doesn't disappear and she ends up deciding to read a book instead of trying to sleep. She doubts she will be able to remember a word she reads but she needs something to keep herself busy with, its just a couple more hours and she will be in New York and Rachel will make everything better… hopefully.

She's woken up by the buzzing of the doors as they start to open, she rubs her eyes and sits up. She doesn't remember falling asleep and she doesn't feel any more rested than she did when she got to the train station, if anything she feels even more tired. She collects her things and looks for the bathroom inside the train, she knows Rachel has been waiting for her for at least ten minutes (she knows her well enough to know that without having to text her), and she wants to freshen up before greeting her, she reckons she must look exhausted and she doesn't want to cause Rachel any worries. To her surprise, she doesn't look as bad as she thought she would; she just looks tired, like she could use at least 12 hours of sleep and she kinda thinks she does.

She takes a deep breath and steps out into the platform. She doesn't even have to wait 20 seconds before she hears Rachel calling her name from a few meters away.

"Quinn! Hey baby, how are you? Oh my God, I missed you so, so, so much!"

Her lips are met by Rachel's, in a sweet kiss, her neck and hair become anchors for Rachel's hands and, for a moment, she is completely submerged in that instant, in that infinite bliss that is Rachel Berry in her atmosphere.

After the kiss dims out, Quinn rests her forehead against Rachel's and breathes in, leaving a kiss on Rachel's nose and leaves her lips there for a moment before she's able to speak.

"I missed you too, Rach. You have no idea how much I've missed you."

She doesn't mean that last part to come out so low, but it does, her voice betrays her and she swallows hard. She just hopes Rachel doesn't notice the shift in her voice and how desperately she's trying not to cry but her hands tremble a little, giving her away, she wonders if her body will ever stop betraying her.

Rachel breaks the embrace and looks at her, running her hand gently across her face, touching her eyebrows and gently pulling on her ear, pressing the tips of her middle and ring fingers against the girl's slightly parted lips and finally pushing away the strands of wild blonde hair that had fallen to her face.

"What is it? Baby? What's wrong?"

Quinn closes her eyes at the feeling of Rachel's soft hands against her face and takes a deep breath.

"It's nothing, Rach. Just… hard days and long nights and I've missed you and it just feels so good to be close to you again and I guess I'm just being silly today. I'm sorry."

Quinn closes her eyes tightly and exhales through her nose, gathering all her strength on that moment so that she won't lose control. Her hands clutch at Rachel's sweater and she's unable to see those brown eyes shifting from pure happiness to worry, she can't see Rachel biting her lip as her mind races trying to remember Quinn ever telling her feeling like that.

"Hey, honey, look at me. Come on, Quinn. I've missed your pretty eyes, will you look at me?"

Quinn feels Rachel gently touching her face and her neck, she feels soft fingertips massaging the back of her neck and relaxes enough to grant Rachel her wish and opening her eyes.

"Hey, there you are. Hello, Quinn. I missed you, you know? Nothing's the same without you here with me."

Rachel's voice is soft and reassuring, a little uncertain perhaps, hesitant and completely unlike Rachel and Quinn realizes she absolutely loathes it. It is not what she wants, she wants Rachel's strong voice and security in what she says, she wants the steadiness that it provides, she needs Rachel to keep her steady even if everything around her is whirling out of control. So she takes a deep breath and musters all the energy she can to open her eyes and smile.

"Good thing I'm here now, right? I'm okay, Rach. I am, I promise. It's just stress and silly things like that, honestly."

She kisses Rachel softly and moves her hands so that they are in Rachel's hair, when the kiss dies she kisses the girl's forehead while she holds her face in her hands.

"We are here, now and we are together and nothing could be better. So, how about we get to your place and spend this whole weekend together?"

Quinn holds Rachel's gaze, she can see there's still hesitance in the girl's eyes but she also sees surrender, she knows Rachel will drop it for now but her slip will eventually end up in a conversation, one she's not sure she's ready to have.


	5. Finality

**Tumblr prompt: Something based on the sentence "Forever and ever. That's how long I said I loved you. But you never said it back.** "

 **A/N: This is not one story, these are just series of angsty/sad prompts.**

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"Quinn? What-What are you doing? What is this?"

Rachel walked into their apartment, it wasn't much but everything in it they had bought together, and now a big portion of it was missing and Quinn was in the living room with three suitcases.

"Are you... Are you leaving me?"

Quinn snorted and shook her head. She was sitting on the couch with her head hidden behind her hands, she didn't look up but she kept shaking her head, her breaths were slow and deliberated. After a minute or two, she let herself fall back on the couch and sighed.

"There was a time when it was kinda cute that you always thought things were about or because of you, I don't know, it was so you that I didn't mind."

Rachel could see as a couple of tears made their way down Quinn's cheeks, but she was still unable to move.

"I guess it's kinda my fault that you convinced yourself that things are actually always about or because of you because I never said anything when it stopped being cute."

The blonde girl chuckled sadly and sighed again, she stood up and made eye contact.

"I am leaving though."

Both girls stood in their places, Quinn in the middle of the living room and Rachel just a couple of steps away from the front door, neither of them said anything, the echo of Quinn's words resounding in every inch of their apartment.

Quinn was expectant of what Rachel would do next, what she would say, how would she react.

"You're... what?"

Rachel had finally come back to reality, she let her purse drop into the ground and took some steps forward, but not really all the way to where Quinn was.

"I'm leaving, Rachel. I have a job offer that I can't reject. Not anymore."

"The one in Chicago? We had talked about this before, I thought we had agreed that it could wait until I finished the show and you had more experience. You said you didn't feel confident enough yet. You said-"

"I know what I said."

The blonde girl's tone was stern, not rude, but firm.

"I've said a lot of things over this past year that have gone by unnoticed."

She pinched the bridge of her nose with her right hand and took a deep breath.

"But anyway. It's not Chicago, it's Seattle. The Swedish Medical Center offered me a position in their surgery department and I can't reject it."

Quinn looked down at her feet, she touched her face with the back of her hand, wiping off tears, and said, in a low voice.

"I don't want to."

Rachel didn't say anything, she didn't move, she didn't react, she just stood there. She could feel her heart racing in her chest, she wanted to move, she wanted to say something, her body was telling her to do something! But, she couldn't.

"This is a good thing, Rachel. It'll do us both well. I can get experience, and you won't be held back by me anymore."

Quinn smiled sadly and grabbed her suitcases. Rachel's body was in shock, her mind was on a loop of "what's happening?", her heart was going faster and faster, her eyesight was watery and her mouth was aching to just say something. Anything! She saw Quinn walking towards her, armed with her suitcases and her goodbye, she saw her put her keys on the table and slide that delicate hand of hers through the cool wooden surface.

"No."

Finally, A word.

"Don't make this difficult, Rachel. Please."

Quinn tried to move forward but Rachel stood in her way.

"No. Wait. Just. Wait... Please."

Quinn shifted her weight to her right foot and exhaled.

"I just. I need a moment; I don't understand... I'm..."

Rachel searched Quinn's eyes, she wanted to touch her, but she couldn't move again.

"Why?"

The question was met with silence, Quinn diverted her eyes and Rachel's were flooded with tears.

"Why, Quinn?"

Their eyes met again, tired and determined, sad and confused; and everything was heavy for an instant until Quinn spoke.

"Because it's time."

With that, Quinn walked again and this time Rachel didn't try to avoid it but when the blonde girl walked past her she held her breath, she held while Quinn opened the door, she held it as Quinn put her luggage, she held it as Quinn spoke again.

"It'll be okay, Rachel. It won't hurt for long."

Rachel let go of her breath and turned around, she caught one final glimpse of Quinn giving her a sad smile and walking away. And Rachel just stood there, until the sky changed and she felt exhaustion wash over her, she could still feel her heart racing, she felt heavy but empty at the same time as she walked to their-to _her_ room, she turned on the light and saw a note on the bed.

Her heart sunk again before she even read it. It was a simple white sheet, with Quinn's perfect penmanship in blue ink.

" _I'm sorry it had to be like this. I'm sorry it didn't work. I'm sorry, I tried and I know you did too. But who knows, maybe we just need to grow. Maybe when you learn to listen because I promised you a forever and ever. That's how long I said I'd love you. But you never said it back._

 _Maybe one day you will, maybe you won't. But for now, this is it._

 _Goodbye, Rachel."_


End file.
